So Depression How Does it Feel

So Depression How Does it Feel

What can I say, you work hard, you throw all your disappointments, hurts and unfulfilment in to the background and just keep moving and moving without realising, the backlog is still there you have not dealt wiith your disappointments, hurts and unfulfilment.

You are strong for others yet deep down you feel betrayed, you feel that all the promises made by others and yourself to yourself have not come to fruition.

You keep on working and working thinking that will solve the problem, you don’t give yourself a break, then it hits you with a thunderous force.

You face anxiety, you have guilt, you cannot move forward, you cannot move backward, a lot turn to something to alleviate the pressure, you are stuck, you break down.

You face a wall, every day is an effort, just to keep living is an effort. You feel as if there is nothing worth living for, your emotions are all over the place, one minute you can cope, the next you are breaking down in tears. You feel useless, worthless, guilty, you have failed.

I have also shown, I hope, that we all have basic emotional and physical needs some of which are included above but some I have not had the space above to mention nutrition and physical activity.

Human beings are individuals and very complex. We, each one, have a myriad of thoughts, ideas, perceptions, understanding. We are amazing creatures. However;

What is Depression – The Modern Mental Illness

There is a new reality out there that is really not so new but has been recognised in latter times:

Physical wellbeing + Mental wellbeing + Spiritual/belief-connection wellbeing = Harmony or all-round wellbeing.

If there is not an all-round balance in a person’s human life then there is either mental, physical or spiritual breakdown, or a mixture of more than one.

They are all connected

What are the causes:

I am not going to make everyone contented, but I am going to mention a few home-truths. On a basic level If any of the emotional/physical/spiritual needs or beliefs of an individual are challenged, taken away or abused then that individual may breakdown eg:

  • Abuse at any point in human life
  • Judgement/prejudice and labelling at any point in human life
  • Physical or Mental health issues
  • lack of understanding at any point in human life
  • Current societal trends of division, fear, greed, abuse of power one over another, competition (the need to succeed).
  • Modern over-controlled society
  • Society’s tendency to label and put everyone in a box to define who they are and how they should act.
  • Lack of usefulness to life
  • Lack of inclusion
  • Lack of belief or something to be useful for
  • Perception of failure
  • Societal guilt for not reaching perceived normal ways of living or conforming to present societal values.
  • Stress/pressure not achieving modern society’s collective demands on how life should be lived/manic pace of life.
  • Poverty, lack of basic physical needs
  • Lack of development of flexible policies in society – ie again not putting individuals in boxes.
  • No room for change or real innovation
  • Lack of listening/communication
  • Frustration and being held back for whatever reason from contributing good, practical, useful ideas
  • Loss of self-belief and anxiety because of false perception about how others value or see you
  • Overwork
  • The stress of caring for others over an extended period of time
  • Lack of understanding of, involvement in, all of natural life on this planet.
  • Lack of respect

These are just some of the causes of depression and I can only go by what my experiences have been, I am sure that there are many, many more.

Why is it such a lonely affliction:

Not many people who are depressed can share their afflictions with others (except professional support). They feel it would be unfair to involve loved ones or family, or they feel excluded and unable to approach anyone, or their anxiety and the paranoia that comes with it prevent them from opening up to anyone.

I do not mean this as labelling but just an observation from my own life experience men very often find it more difficult than women to open up because of societal values, they have learned that they are the providers, they have to be strong, you are not a man if you let go and cry.

There is treatment and help out there:

There are medical drugs you can take to lift your mood and make you able to cope with the day.

There are therapy groups and crisis phone lines etc.

These treat the symptoms of the illness, however, only the person afflicted can go back to the route of the problem and understand for themselves how to find a more permanent cure.

For families and loved ones it can be extremely hard to support someone with depression but on behalf of anyone with this affliction thank you very much for all the support, it does make a difference and is needed. Just a phone-call or a message that shows someone does care can make the difference between someone living and dying.

I have written this from my own viewpoint as a person who suffers from depression and as a person who cares very deeply about making things better and bringing some change in perception if possible.

Thank you for reading

Sandra Marshall

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